When I decided to get serious about my passion for all food orgasmic I wanted an easy way to get my recipes into my blog posts AND a way to offer a print option to my readers.  The plugins on offer were either difficult to set up or slow to use.

I went to my favorite programmer – he also serves as first class recipe tester, garbage dumper, bug killer and bed warmer around here too, and asked if he could write a plugin that would be simple to use, quick and easy to use and include all the microformatting that Google requires in order to have a chance at getting listed in Google’s Recipe View.

After rolling his eyes he said yes.

“I want a plugin that describes the settings in human words not geek”

“I want a plugin that allows me to cut and paste from my computer’s recipe program or off the net.”

“I want a plugin that allows my readers to print my recipe and I want a thumbnail photo in the print thingy too.”

“I want a plugin that is easy to edit because I am always typing too fast and I make typos.”

“I want a plugin to allow my readers to rate my recipe and have that show up on Google and the print page.”

“Finally and most importantly – DON’T MAKE ME THINK !!  Seriously, I want to cook and the plugin do all the work.”

To which he replied what every man would reply, “yes, dear.”

It’s a week since I made that request and EasyRecipe launched today.  I figured, why keep this to myself.  When I was looking for a wordpress plugin for recipes there weren’t many to choose from.

If you’re like me and are looking for a new plugin to format your recipes for your blog AND to give Mr. Google all the information he requires for Recipe View, then give EasyRecipe a looksee.  If you try it and you like it and you come up with suggestions to make it better, let us know.  My programmer works for orgasmic food – well, let’s be honest, he works for anything orgasmic.

I hate boring vegetables.  I know, I can hear you telling me that eating greens that have been barely frightened by a hot pot of water for 1/10th of a second are good for me – but really, it’s healthy but it’s not orgasmic.  Not for me anyway.  I like color and excitement on my plate – right down to a side dish of veggies.

I received a fruit basket from a friend and it had some lovely almost black grapes in it.  Really sweet and juicy.  I thought.. “I’ll make Halloween grapes in March!”

I scraped and sliced the carrots into coins and cooked them in boiling salted water until just tender.  For those of you who don’t eat butter, look away now, because I added a tablespoon of butter, some nice sea salt crystals, some freshly grated colored peppercorns, a big handful of grapes sliced in half and a handful of freshly chopped parsley.

If you’re looking for a nice vegetable side dish, try it.  It was really good alongside crusty roasted potatoes and rare roast beef.  I stirred it up and placed it in a bowl and it looked like this!

Yesterday I read David Lebovitz‘ blog about the indignity of being measured for socks and about buying bum scratcher jam. I love the way he writes and his photography is what we all aspire to. It’s no wonder he’s the top foodie blogger in the world. Not only does he write well, have fantastic photography but the recipes are top drawer. Where would my family be without his ice cream recipe??

His sock story reminded me of a similar incident that happened to me in Hong Kong a few years ago. We decided to take a trip to Hong Kong and get some clothes made for the hubby – not because we needed the clothes but because we thought it was a cool thing to do. I hadn’t planned on getting anything made but when we got there I was encouraged to look at the ladies suits on display.  Did I say encouraged?  Hong Kong salesmen do not encourage – they sell in a way that you cannot say no.

I found one that I liked and then another and then another and then had to select the fabric and then came the measuring. I’m short and I’m round. There is nothing they won’t measure and they don’t fret about touching any of the bits that are only used in private and it’s all done right inside the big glass windows of the shop!

We were asked to come back at 4pm to try on the muslin samples and that the suits would be ready to pick up the following day. The muslin samples fit perfectly and we were looking forward to trying the finished clothes on the the next day. The tailor was in the shopping center below the hotel so it wasn’t far to walk. Sort of like an elevator ride from our room to the store.

At the appointed time we returned to the store and our clothes were ready for the final fitting. I tried on the navy blue suit and it was perfect – ready to put in the suitcase.. nothing needed. Then I tried on the black and white houndstooth suit. The design I had selected had four pockets with little pocket flaps. My suit had only the lower pockets.

I looked at the tailor who spoke no English and the salesman and said in my best Chinese, “no pockets?” and pointed to my boobs. (that’s the best Chinese I can do)

The little tailor walked up to me (in the middle of the crowded shop, I might add) and said, “NO FLAP, NO FLAP” as he swept his hand across first on one breast and then another in a big flourish, and then said as loudly as I thought he was capable of, “NO FLAP, NO FLAP, TOO BIG, TOO BIG !!”  My husband sitting on the far side of the shop nearly choked on his laughter and I wished at that moment he would have.  Bastard.

Perhaps I neglected to mention that I’m rather well endowed and this little man figured I didn’t need any more attention to my love bubbles than they already got.

I couldn’t buy any bum scratcher jam like David Lebovitz can buy in Paris but yesterday I DID buy some Bum Hummer pickled onions – 1,000 farts per jar. Does that count?

To me, nothing smells like home more than bread that’s just been pulled out of the oven.   At a party last week I brought up the topic of bread and the preservatives that the bakeries use that keeps the bread fresh for nearly a week.  I asked how many of them made their own bread.  With one exception they all just stared back as if I was from a different planet.

One woman said that her life was hectic enough without having make bread too.  She told me later that she felt I was attacking her for not being a good mother because she served her kids bread with perservatives in it.  Lordy, that’s not what I meant at all.  I hate the idea of all the preservatives in prepared food.  I can’t believe that they’re good for us.

With automatic bread makers priced so nearly everyone can afford one, I’m really surprised that most people don’t bake their own bread. 5 minutes and the work is done.  If you use scales to weigh your water and flour there’s no guessing.  The possibilities are huge as to what sorts of bread you can make.  Choose a basic recipe and add different things to make it your own.  Add onion, or herbs or dried fruit or seeds — they’re all yummy and healthy.

I’m not normally a healthy fantatic – I like orgasmic food, but bread is a standout healthy item for me.  I love nice grain bread with a softish crust — it makes a great sandwich. At the moment pistachio dukkah is my favorite but probably like you, my favorites change with the wind.

For those people who don’t own an automatic bread maker, nothing could be easier than no-knead bread. I love this bread for bruschetta or dipped in olive oil and a good syrupy balsamic vinegar and then dipped in dukkah. At the moment pistachio dukkah is my favorite but probably like you, my favorites change with the wind. I first heard about no-knead bread on the net and then found this video by the New York Times. If you haven’t made no-knead bread, try it, even if you do have a bread machine. It’s mildly sour, super crusty and one of the best loaves of bread. You can even make this for company and know it’s going to look and taste great. Here’s the video.